The FREEDOM of Forgiveness

We are all taught from a young age what it looks like to forgive someone and to be forgiven. Forgiveness, in its purest sense, is the INTENTIONAL and VOLUNTARY process of releasing feelings of resentment or vengeance toward a person or group of people that has harmed you, REGARDLESS of whether they actually deserve your forgiveness or not.

Oftentimes, people associate forgiveness as something you GIVE to ANOTHER person, however, when it really comes down to it the act of forgiveness is truly a gift to YOURSELF. When we choose to hold grudges, suppress our anger or show bitterness towards others, it actually ends up HURTING US, sometimes even more than the harmful event itself. Forgiveness, on the other hand, enables you to OVERCOME negative emotions or traumatic experiences and EMBRACE peace, hope and gratitude.

There is a certain JOY in the freedom that forgiveness brings. While forgiveness tends to hold various meanings to different people, the fact of the matter is that it has the power to not only change your perspective, but also LEAD you down a path of physical, emotional and spiritual well-being.

Forgiveness is NOT the same thing as forgetting or excusing the harm that you experienced. Even though the act that hurt or offended you may never be forgotten, the act of forgiveness can LESSEN its impact and FREE you from the control it may have over you. Whether or not the person who harmed you has apologized or repented for the damage done, forgiveness takes the weight off of your shoulders and can even create feelings of understanding, empathy and compassion for the one who caused you pain.

Forgiveness is not a feeling, but rather a process involving trust, surrender and acceptance. Accepting forgiveness FROM OTHERS that we have wronged can also be a challenge at times. Our ability to forgive is directly correlated to, and contingent upon, our ability to also accept the forgiveness that has been GIVEN to us. A failure to forgive is not without consequence, and if we, too, want to be forgiven, then it is essential to extend the same forgiveness to others, and ourselves. It is important to note that while forgiveness is a necessary tool in bringing peace to ourselves, there are certain situations in which forgiveness may not feel attainable for you. If this is the case, then it is imperative that you create BOUNDARIES and separate yourself from a toxic person or situation. All in all, forgiveness is a JOURNEY of repentance, and extending forgiveness to yourself and others takes time. Sometimes you may need to forgive again and again, but you ALWAYS have the CHOICE of letting it get to you, or letting it go. Some benefits of forgiveness that bring greater health and peace of mind include: + healthier relationships + improved mental health + less anxiety, stress and hostility + lower blood pressure + fewer symptoms of depression + stronger immune system + greater empathy towards others + improved heart health + strengthened self-esteem + crowding out of negative feelings In order to make the transition AWAY from suffering and TOWARDS a life of forgiveness you can take ACTION by: 01. learning to recognize the value it has and how it can improve your life 02. identifying what needs healing and who needs to be forgiven for what 03. considering joining a support group or seeing a therapist/counselor 04. acknowledging your emotions about the harm done and how it affects your behavior, and then working to release them 05. choosing to forgive the person who offended you 06. moving away from your role as victim and releasing the power that person or situation has had in your life Remember, forgiveness is a COMMITMENT; one that you make TO yourself and FOR yourself. When you can learn to forgive others outwardly and openly, while also extending the same compassion and grace internally, you will begin to not only see, but FEEL how freeing it truly is.

Xx, Leah Kutsch P.S. Keeping IIN Touch